Unlearning What the World Taught Me About Success

 For most of my life, success looked like a checklist.

A perfectly structured, socially approved path:
Get good grades.
Go to university.
Land a “respectable” job.
Make money.
Buy things.
Climb the ladder.
Smile while doing it.

And for a while, I chased it. Hard.
Not because it truly felt right  but because I thought I had to. That was what success meant, right? That was what “making it” looked like. Everyone around me seemed to agree.

But then I got there  or at least close enough  and it felt… empty.
Heavy, Confusing. Like I was performing a life instead of living it.
And slowly, painfully, I realized: maybe the world lied to me about what success really means.

The Metrics Were All External

Everything I was taught about success came with numbers attached.
Grades. Followers. Salaries. Titles.
It was all about how much, how fast, how far.
But no one ever asked me if I was happy. If I felt whole. If I was okay.

Success was always tied to achievement, never to peace.
But peace, I’ve learned, is the real flex.

The Hustle Nearly Broke Me

I wore burnout like a badge of honor.
If I was tired, it meant I was working hard.
If I was always busy, it meant I was important.
I didn’t rest  I recharged to keep grinding. I didn’t enjoy I celebrated while planning my next move.

But beneath all that ambition was fear.
Fear of being “behind.” Fear of being forgotten.
Fear that slowing down meant failure.

Until one day, I couldn’t go anymore. And instead of pushing through, I sat with myself  really sat  and asked, “Who am I without the noise?”

Success, Redefined

What if success isn’t what we achieve, but how we feel while achieving it?
What if it’s:

  • Waking up excited (not anxious).

  • Having time for people you love.

  • Saying no without guilt.

  • Doing work that aligns with your values  even if it pays less.

  • Choosing a slower path that feels like yours.

I’ve started to believe that success isn’t a destination.
It’s a state of being.
And it looks different for everyone.

Unlearning Isn’t Easy

It takes time to let go of what you were conditioned to believe.
To stop measuring your life by how “impressive” it looks and start asking how aligned it feels.
To accept that success might look quiet. Messy. Deeply personal.

Some people won’t get it.
They’ll think you’re playing small.
But maybe, just maybe  you’re finally playing real.

My Success Now?

It’s peace.
It’s purpose.
It’s presence.

It’s no longer chasing  it’s choosing.
It’s living a life that makes sense to me, even if no one else claps for it.

Because real success isn’t about what the world sees. It’s about what you feel when you’re alone with yourself.

And when I started choosing that version of success  I didn’t lose.
I found myself.

x: @NdayisengaRebe2

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